One of my colleagues in the office commented to me last week that a relative of hers was "too busy" to let her know of some serious family news from afar. This news would impact my friend's children and travel.
REALLY??? You're too busy to send a 60 second e-mail? Too busy to send a 20 second text? Too busy to leave a voice mail? What bunk!
We all have occasions when someone says, "oh, I was thinking of you....we should do something....but I've been SO busy!" Busy apparently with things far more important that nurturing relationships and family. REALLY???
I am intrigued by how the notion got lodged in North American heads that being busy was somehow equated with being worthwhile or valued. When did "getting ahead" become a nobler goal than bonding and having valuable time to visit and play and putter together? And once you are ahead, are you ever far enough ahead? And if you're far enough ahead I guess you're alone. Everyone else got tired of playing second fiddle to your always putting work ahead of them.
Why is enough never enough so the chase for more -- more money, more deals, more anything -- relentless? From what I understand when wild animals are sated they let prey walk right by unharmed. They are full, why would they tackle another hunt until they are in need of more sustenance? And they say mankind is the crowning creation??
I confessed to a friend that when someone comes into work on Monday after a picture perfect Okanagan weekend bragging about how busy they were working all weekend that the thought that occurs to me is that they're not very bright. I rather admire the one that comes in with tales of playing in the lake or hiking in the hills. To be perfectly frank when someone says to me "I am SO BUSY," in my mind it translate to "I am SO misguided."
As an aside there is a real estate trainer who encourages Realtors to sign off "I'm never too busy for your referrals!" Ha! They might be too busy to have coffee with you, but never too busy for more work! But I digress...
Of course we all have times of intensity in our work and lives; situational busyness is not what I'm speaking about. Its the chronically busy ones that I worry about. We all have those people who can never sit still long enough to really listen to anyone talk who isn't talking about work. Don't you feel special when someone is reading a text while half listening to you? Warms the heart, eh? How about the friends that are too busy to even acknowledge the invitation to come share a meal? REALLY??? Someone invites you to their home and you can't take a moment to even reply?
Could it be that "being busy" is an addiction? Perhaps the litmus test would be that if the thought of open space unfilled by busy work sends a shiver of fear down your spine it might be time for an intervention.
Interventions come in the form of lunches with cell phones off and walks in the neighbourhood with time to say hello and visit. Interventions come in the form of building sandcastles with children and riding that horse that's become a pasture ornament. Intervention comes in the form of coffees with meaningful conversations with family and friends. It comes in taking the time to write a note or make a call when you're thinking of someone. It comes in the form of taking care of your health and stimulating your mind with new ideas. Intervention comes with first questioning why being busy has been given a place of honour above living a balanced and fun filled life.
For the record, one of my favourite activities is spending time with past clients who have become friends. I will sign off by saying, "I'm never too busy for YOU!"
REALLY??? You're too busy to send a 60 second e-mail? Too busy to send a 20 second text? Too busy to leave a voice mail? What bunk!
We all have occasions when someone says, "oh, I was thinking of you....we should do something....but I've been SO busy!" Busy apparently with things far more important that nurturing relationships and family. REALLY???
I am intrigued by how the notion got lodged in North American heads that being busy was somehow equated with being worthwhile or valued. When did "getting ahead" become a nobler goal than bonding and having valuable time to visit and play and putter together? And once you are ahead, are you ever far enough ahead? And if you're far enough ahead I guess you're alone. Everyone else got tired of playing second fiddle to your always putting work ahead of them.
Why is enough never enough so the chase for more -- more money, more deals, more anything -- relentless? From what I understand when wild animals are sated they let prey walk right by unharmed. They are full, why would they tackle another hunt until they are in need of more sustenance? And they say mankind is the crowning creation??
I confessed to a friend that when someone comes into work on Monday after a picture perfect Okanagan weekend bragging about how busy they were working all weekend that the thought that occurs to me is that they're not very bright. I rather admire the one that comes in with tales of playing in the lake or hiking in the hills. To be perfectly frank when someone says to me "I am SO BUSY," in my mind it translate to "I am SO misguided."
As an aside there is a real estate trainer who encourages Realtors to sign off "I'm never too busy for your referrals!" Ha! They might be too busy to have coffee with you, but never too busy for more work! But I digress...
Of course we all have times of intensity in our work and lives; situational busyness is not what I'm speaking about. Its the chronically busy ones that I worry about. We all have those people who can never sit still long enough to really listen to anyone talk who isn't talking about work. Don't you feel special when someone is reading a text while half listening to you? Warms the heart, eh? How about the friends that are too busy to even acknowledge the invitation to come share a meal? REALLY??? Someone invites you to their home and you can't take a moment to even reply?
Could it be that "being busy" is an addiction? Perhaps the litmus test would be that if the thought of open space unfilled by busy work sends a shiver of fear down your spine it might be time for an intervention.
Interventions come in the form of lunches with cell phones off and walks in the neighbourhood with time to say hello and visit. Interventions come in the form of building sandcastles with children and riding that horse that's become a pasture ornament. Intervention comes in the form of coffees with meaningful conversations with family and friends. It comes in taking the time to write a note or make a call when you're thinking of someone. It comes in the form of taking care of your health and stimulating your mind with new ideas. Intervention comes with first questioning why being busy has been given a place of honour above living a balanced and fun filled life.
For the record, one of my favourite activities is spending time with past clients who have become friends. I will sign off by saying, "I'm never too busy for YOU!"
2 comments:
The words "I Am" expressed along with the word "Never" should be the obvious prelude to disaster.
Great post Beth!
Fabulous article Beth! What a great reminder that we are so much more than our work. We will never put on our gravestones I wish I spent more time at the office or vaccumming.
Post a Comment